Already weeks ago I noticed an intolerance for certain foods. When I look back this intolerance was already there for at least a year, but more hidden and less present. First it was obvious which products caused problems, then the amount of intolerances speeded up to the point that I was sure that I had an intolerance for all foods, even the word food. I felt downcast and searched for ways to get me out of this point of “feeling” and I needed something more touchable than feelings within my physical world. I couldn’t believe that a person could be intolerant to food in general, so in that case I was mind fucking and deluding myself.
I started my own diet of stripping all types of foods and drinks and started over with water and carrots. Every day I added something new and wrote down on which foods I reacted and tracked down what my definition of these foods were. This was at that point the only way to see what I was dealing with. The amount of foods to research was a reasonable amount and while still busy with it the intolerances faded away. I started to eat the “forbidden” foods again in small amounts to see what it did to my physical body, nothing much really. I abandoned my research and continued with normal life again. That’s how we humans operate, when things turn bad we act, when things go as normal or even good we will not question.
In this period of food intolerances I was at the same time peeling of layers within my process. When I continued eating normal while all looked fine again I had a moment of, how should I say, a sort of nothingness, a too calm period, a void. This static state of being started to irritate me, I committed to process and I started biting through my mess and I didn’t like to stop and rest, I desired to continue at the same constant quiet pace. Biting, biting, eating, chewing, till the mess is cleared whenever that may be. Quite a fascinating phrase I just wrote, a metaphor with food related words, mmm interesting.
Now when having myself totally surrendered to the mind constructs I started to notice an intolerance for certain, already identified foods from before. At that point I saw the connection between these two periods of peeling of layers and realizing myself. This time I did avoid or ate only small, tiny amounts of these foods, to reduce irritation. It looks like I’m really sensitive while peeling my layers and once I’m more stable within those points the food intolerance fades away.
It’s kind of a cool tool this body of my, it indicates all kind of things, that is if I’m willing to slow down and see.