Sylvia's writing to freedom

My foster tree 09/06/2011

About 2 months ago we received a letter from a country house in Bologna, addressed to my partner P. A letter in a fancy envelope and printed on the same fancy paper. First I thought it was advertisement, but those companies don’t use fancy paper. We do not know any country house in Bologna, so curiosity made us read the letter. I was astonished about the content of the letter when P. read it to me.


The letter explained that we were the happy foster parents of a peach tree. When at the tree, end of spring, will bear fruit we would get 15 kilo’s of peaches. A variety of peaches from lower and higher branches, so that not all fruit would be over mature after shipping. We looked at each other and I said, what are we going to do with 15 kilo of peaches. We don’t eat marmelade, I could make a cake, but that’s not going to make the 15 kilo away. I suggested to give portions away to people who we knew were in financial trouble just like us not so long ago.


The question was still, why are we all of a sudden foster parents of this tree? It was not hard to see through the money making “sceme” of this country house. I’m not saying this in a negatively way, but it’s clear that they needed money and started this “ecological hype” of adopting trees. The 15 kilo’s of peaches were guaranteed, which means that either our tree makes more than 15 kilo’s so there is no risk and the tree can even function as another adoption project for another person or the country house buys from third parties when the tree produces less than 15 kilo’s. Letting all conspiracies aside, the letter explained that my father-in-law had adopted the peach tree for us.


Another surprise, since we broke all contact in winter when I clearly could see how we, my parents-in-law and my brother-in-law kept an abusive behavior alive revolving around money. After we broke the contact we ┬ástill received a few hate mails and they tried to communicate with our kids. Our kids were stable and well informed about what had happend over the last 5 years and therefore not subject to manipulation. So there was this big silence and now the silence was broken by the letter from Bologna. The letter didn’t of course explain why we all of a sudden were the proud parents of a tree. No surprise e-mail from my in-laws to explain anything, just this letter on fancy paper.


I simply couldn’t see the common sense in the whole tree issue. First of all I have a garden full of a variety of fruit trees, there are country houses here in the area that offer the same adoption plans, this way the peaches didn’t have to travel about 200 km from Bologna to here. Then there was still this why, why this gift from my in-laws. My mind started producing some answers, they want to make up for what happened. They can only think in money and gifts to try and solve problems so they came up with this. They think that they know us, so they selected an ecological country house and a ecological tree, to met our concerns for the environment. The most practical way would be to ask them, but I do not want give them “hope” on reinstalling our past abusive relationship. So the most practical options is therefore no option. I let it go and deal with it again when the peaches and if the peaches would arrive.


Yesterday a courier rang at the gate, with 3 flattened, heavy cardboard boxes. I signed, but I had still no clue what was in the boxes. I looked again and saw yellow, within a flash I remembered my tree. OMG this is 15 kilo of peaches! At least not a complete sceme, since the peaches arrived. After inspecting them we saw that almost all the peaches were over mature and several ready to throw away immediately. The splashed peaches had wettend the cardboard boxes and the boxes were crushed due to the moist.The boxes were made out of fancy, with leaves printed cardboard, but the good old wood boxes would have been less appealing but not less effective.


P. handpicked the peaches and brought several kilo’s to several people. My son J. and his dad came up with the idea to make juice out of the rest of the peaches. For juices you need a lot of fruit and in this case we had a lot of fruit. I’ve no idea if the foster tree was only a one year deal or if we will receive peaches ones a year from now on, the letter didn’t tell. The best options in order to move on, is to call the country house and inform if this is a longterm lease. If so I will opt for breaking the contract or at least not receiving the fruit the coming next years. Then it’s up to my father-in-law if he still wants to sponsor this country house, because that’s what this is all about, marketing. And our relationship that can’t be fixed by marketing, only time will show us if the relationship will stand the test of time.


Before I would feel manipulated by my in-laws, now I see the manipulation and I do not participate. That’s what living by the principles of life has brought me so far and I’m enjoying it every day more.