Sylvia's writing to freedom

Why are Destonians blogging the hell out off themselves? 13/02/2012

Writing is one of the many tools a Destonian has to his/her disposal. When you write in words,  that what keeps you busy inside of you, you’ll place information/knowledge from your mind into your physical reality. Whenever points are written in black and white, thoughts/memories/feelings/emotions/fears they become tangible and are ready to be dealt with. We’re able to read our writings from many years ago, but we’re not able to repeat our words from years ago word by word. Words that are spoken out loud on a video, vlogs, have the same principle, it’s making your inner reality into tangible earthly moments.

Starting this process of writing oneself out is a process on it’s own, many times we think we do not have anything to write about or it doesn’t matter what we have to say, but that’s only false modesty. It’s simply training oneself into taking a moment to express oneself in written words. Writers blocks, blanks, it all will be there as a  challenge from Self to Self. When one doesn’t want to reveal oneself to Self it’s obvious that the mind will try to block us. The question is, are we willing to give into that or are we willing to push through those moments of resistance to discover what needs to be hidden and can’t stand day light according to our mind/ego.

When we look at our society we see that whenever a message is important it will be in written form. The justice system uses written words and gives value to those words in order to convict one or not. When we have to pay our bills it’s in writing and when we do not pay we get more writings from a bailiff. When we get a job, our job description is in writing, to remind us of our obligations and to sue us whenever we are negligent. The police writes a police report in order to see whether you’re guilty or not. School wants you to write in order to imprint the information the system wants to implement in our future generation. The list goes on and on, we in the system use written words whenever we want to deliver an important message which is always a one way communication.

So to many of us writing and using words in black and white are equal to obliging oneself to the system which is in most cases the opposite of our own desires and wishes. And in a way we oblige ourselves when writing ourselves out, because once it’s out on paper/computer it is there right in front of us and can’t be erased. Whether you stripe through your words, they’ll be burnt onto your retina and you know what your dealing with. That might be a frightening experience, but try and see the beauty of it. Every word you write within Self-honesty is a gift to Self, to evolve into a being that is willing to take Self-responsibility for his/her own words/actions.

It’s important to get all the shit that is inside of us out in writing and see the patterns that are there visible for our eye in writing. One can do as much inner talk/back chat as one wishes, the real issue will never be as clear as when we write it down. From time to time we will be shocked by our own words, but that’s fine, it’s simply a reality check.

It took me quite a while before I dared to write about myself in black and white, as if I felt that once I started this process of writing there was no way back. From writing a bit now and then I started writing every day. Then I started blogs and went in the open with my writings on the internet. Warnt by many close to me that it might not be such a good idea to share all the struggles inside of me. Some even asked to not be mentioned within the blogs. Which reveals to us our extensive fear for the written word. I continued and started to write not only about my inner struggles but also about the struggles in our world, which isn’t a big step sidewards, since my inner struggles are one and equal to the outer struggles in our world.

I started enjoying this writing and I saw how I was able to grow through these writings. I had placed myself in black and white, able to see for all the world what I had accepted and allowed inside of me, as me equal to my world. I started to create an audience and there another point opened up. By sharing all that’s in me I touch upon all that is inside of you, see we’re more similar then we want to admit. So if I benefit from writing myself out, I bet it will benefit also you. Embrace this process of gifting yourself to yourself and see in common sense where you can improve yourself.

Within our writings as Destonians we use Self-forgiveness to pin point in Self-honesty what we have been accepting and allowing and from there on we write Self Corrective Statements to remind ourselves of the agreement we made with Self to keep our words and actions in line with the best interest of all. That way we discover the living words which can be spoken or written in Self-honesty to bring about change in this world that is sustainable. Writing nice stories that will flatter you will take you into vanity and ego, where we all will end up from time to time. Though when you start knowing yourself through your writings, you can see that vanity and ego are a point to take on without shame or suppression.

Ever wondered why Destonians are writing themselves to freedom? Simple we free ourselves from all that was attached to our words as emotions/feelings/fears to see that real freedom is not within mind reality, but instead here within our physical reality where words are words and have no polarized load to them. Simply communicating from Self to Self and to all the other Selves. Join us and blog the hell out off yourself to reveal you to yourself and be proud within humbleness on the steps that you take forward in the best interest of all.

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Nothing to say or write to myself 04/11/2010

This morning, while cutting endless peaces of fabric for curtains for a client, I was reflecting upon yesterday. I had made the commitment to write everyday a blog and yesterday evening I was sitting in front of my computer and staring at an empty template. I couldn’t think of anything to write and the few things I came up with I disregarded as not interesting enough to share. So I asked myself why I write these blogs, if I disregard things as not interesting enough than I might write to entertain. And maybe I am, because that’s the way I used to write. My starting point for my blog was that of being effective within my writing to assist myself within process and to involve others so they might understand what I’m doing. I label myself as effective when others pay attention to what I write, I also label myself as effective when I break through a point or when things become clear to me after writing it down. So it must always be a spectaculair moment, wow now I look at it I can clearly see what I’ve been doing. Normal daily stuff isn’t good enough for me otherwise I had filled in my template with words last night. Fuck, I’m disregarding myself and I do not see myself as interesting and spectaculair enough to expose myself on the internet…

There were 2 points I could have written about yesterday yet I shove them aside. I resisted to write about it, because I didn’t really saw myself within the events. I didn’t see myself yet I was cristal clear within my communication towards myself. I didn’t see myself while I was screaming at myself. The first event was me commenting on Brett’s topic on the open forum of the Desteni web-site. Basically I asked him not to post these kind of topics on the open forum when he wasn’t going to share himself or his process with others. I asked him if it was out of loneliness that he posted these things so he could just communicate with others. I checked my starting point before posting the post, but I didn’t hear me screaming to myself. In a way I was reacting to his post while I was dealing myself with the point of not sharing me with myself. I refused to communicate with myself through writing and it’s not been the first time.

Than later that day my partner P. said that he found my current writings really assisting. I hesitated, but said to him:” you can’t go through process only by reading about the processes of others”, my point didn’t came across clearly and I wasn’t willing to clarify my self more. In fact again I was screaming to myself and didn’t hear it. I am not consistent within my own writings and that’s where my responsibility lie’s, I can’t order  P. to start writing himself through his own process. He has to figure that out for himself, I can only be an example.

Looking back at yesterday it was as if I had shifted into another dimension. I had been a zombie throughout the day. I was searching for myself while I was tapping on my own shoulder. Today I’m back in the here and now and started the morning of with a coughing fit, after watching my facebook wall, and it ended up in a hyperventilation attack. I immediately started the 4 counts breathing technic and within a few minutes I cleared the attack. I saw how it all interconnected, it was all about communication. I have to commit to communicating with myself and therefore my outer world. I need to unconditionally share and express myself to progress within my process. If I’m not unconditionally willing to change myself, how on earth can I reflect my change upon society. If I want change, I have to change.

I can also see now how this point of communication is connected to the point of resisting to learn to speak Italian more effective. That one is on my list to open up next. Than I will share my self forgivenesses and corrective statements.